Sometimes Chronic Illness Just Sucks

Nemo Here :)
It is so great to be back and writing on The Medical Dorm again. The last few weeks have been full of spoonie experiences, most of which are completely new for me. For the first time ever I have ever been forced to leave school to focus on my medical conditions.
It turns out that I had been having problems because I have gastroparesis or delayed stomach emptying. This diagnosis does not play well with my other diagnosis so that will make for an interesting year. I have learned a lot in the past two weeks. I, like many other spoonies have to learn to fight through the pain and ignore symptoms in order to be productive. I have learned that this does not always work.
At the beginning of starting to write this post, I was going to write something uplifting about how it is important to always be positive even when chronic illness gets you down, but I just couldn't write it. This just kind of sucks. It is important to be positive, but it is equally as important to let yourself feel what you need to feel in order to cope with what is happening in life.
Over the past two weeks I have been told everything happens for a reason, fake it till you make it, a fake smile will turn into a real smile eventually, and enjoy your time off school. For starters, time off school is hanging out with friends or going on vacation not waiting in a hospital bed while it takes eight hours and nine attempts to put in an IV line.
Caregivers and support are important but they can not ever fully understand what it means to live with a chronic illness unless they are living with one themselves. Sometimes it is important to cry or get angry. I have done both of these things and it is not a sign of giving up it just means that I need to cope with my change in life circumstances before I am able to face it head on and go through any appointments and testing that needs to be done until the next time I am in the hospital.
The reason I say until next time is that chronic means that there is NOT a treatment. I, and I am sure many of you have been asked when are you cured. Well the answer is never, or at least not with the current science. Living with chronic illness is not about getting a cure, it is about getting treatment and rolling with what life has to offer.
So for anybody out there with a chronic illness you are allowed to cope and react any way that you need. For caregivers, sometimes smiling until everything gets better is much more difficult and less effective than having a good cry or just admitting that being in the hospital or chronically ill can just flat out suck at time. Chronic illness support means that it is important to be supportive through the good, the bad, and the ugly.

No Matter What you are Going Through WE BELIEVE IN YOU

Tremors and Nemo

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